Preserving the War in Iraq

You know, it's pretty simple -- we have to maintain our invasion of Iraq. We need an ongoing reason to fund our major corporate friends. We need the crucial location for our upcoming invasion of Iran. We have a lot of unfinished business there. And we have to periodically pick up some crappy little country and throw it against the wall just to show the world who's boss -- something we will fail at if we leave without having really proven that we are the world's boss.

Oh, and democracy and peace and stuff like that.

So, thank god the American people don't have the foggiest idea what's actually happening in Iraq. Like the real deal on our poster boy, Gen. Petraeus. Or the news that the alliance that leads what passes for a national legislature has just fallen apart -- oops.

My God, the Democrats Are Dumber than a Pile of Toe Nail Clippings

The Democrats sure are making it easy for me to take the White House. Just listen to what their Whip says: if General Petraeus issues a really positive report on Iraq, the Democrats will fall apart on the war.

Now isn't that just about the dumbest thing you've ever heard?

Of course Petraeus is going to put out a positive report. It's Bush's war... he has to put out a positive report.

And the aftermath means that Democrats are going to continue to be weak on the issue that gave them back control of the Congress.

Which means -- the public will continue to have low opinions of the Democrats in Congress. And that means that whichever one is the presidential nominee -- Hillary or Obama -- it doesn't matter, either way they're going to come into the race with that taint.

And Big Daddy is going to be the one person in the race who had nothing to do with that incompetent in the White House or the lame Congress that can't get its act together.

"A vote for me is a vote for change." Lord, I crack myself up. But that's the kind of bullshit that's going to be my ticket to the White House.